Ninja Assassin.

Ninjas ninjas ninjas a perfect recipe for martial arts film? You’d think so wouldn’t ya?

Ninja Assassin centres around Rzu a orphan raised to be a assassin of the ninja varieties, but after completing his training he decides he’d prefers not to be a super cool ninja warrior he’d rather look into other career paths, figure skating maybe. This of course enrages his now former clan so they set about hunting him down and who can blame them ninja training isn’t cheap, not to mention the how hassle they need to go though in the recruitment process .

Okay so it may not surprise you that the story is quite weak if you can really even call it a story at all. To go into more detail Rzu isn’t just being hunted by a clan of ninjas, he’s hunting them as well so he can (surprise, surprise) avenge his dead girlfriend. That’s not all, I’m forgetting our second protagonist a American girls who’s name I can’t remember. Who works for a government agency that discovers that this same ninja clan has been secretly caring out assassinations on behalf of governments all over the world. So now she’s being hunted by them as well. So of course Rzu tracks her down, because you can’t go on a quest for revenge with out some helpless stranger to rescue every five minutes, it’s the law. The plot is just so much weaker then it could have been.

To be honest plot isn’t the reason we watch films like this, is it? No it the action and you must be thinking “ if the plot sucks, surely there must be some kick ass martial arts and fight scene?” no . although it is a non stop rollercoaster of blood and violence all the impressive stuff and the blood is do with cgi and not done very well. Its just so unrealistic its unbelievable and a bit stupid. I mean who ever wrote this clearly took all the old legends about ninjas to heart so they are portrayed as super humans who can literally vanish in the shadows and throw ninjas star with the same accuracy and speed of a machine gun.

Ninja Assassin is really one to avoid bad plot, bad acting, bad everything. Go watch Seven Swords instead..