Anyway, as it’s launch day you may have seen those queues of over excited early adopters queing at their local Apple stores for their shiny new phones. You may well be actually in one of those queues. With that in mind, let me give you some advice on keeping yourself entertained while you wait.
Practice your kung fu
Let’s face it, release days for new tech items are a field day for muggers. The last thing you want is to get your hands on that phone, only for some scumbag to rip it out of them (and sell it on ebay for stupid money). Don’t stand for it! As you wait, practice your best martial arts moves. If anyone tries to grab your shiny new toy, they’ll receive a karate chop to the throat for their trouble. Just watch where you’re flailing your arms in that queue.
Make some friends
Why not? Get chatting, swap email addresses and add each other on Facebook. That way, you can then get together when you have your iPhone and compare notes. ‘Does yours have an extra row for icons?’ ‘IT DOES! Let’s be BFFs!’
Call your mum
That is, assuming you still have your iPhone 4S on you and you haven’t pitched it into a nearby skip in anticipation of the upgrade. Call your mum. You probably haven’t seen her in a while. Yes, call. Remember, that thing that all phones can do but we haven’t used since, say, 2008?
Ask Siri stupid questions
Because let’s face it, she’s good for nothing else. ‘Do mice walk on stilts?’ ‘Is the moon watching me?’ ‘Are your feet made of cheese?’ May as well confuse the guys who monitor all this noise for a laugh.
Think about what that cash could have been better spent on
Like your rent, for instance. Or a boatload of groceries. Or the repairs your car sorely needs. Oh, who am I kidding, it’s your cash, do what you like. Enjoy your iPhone 5!
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