Delicious cake

Oh hello.

Your friend is busy today... testing.

That's why I'm here... To help.

Instead of your normal "Post" today we shall make cake.

Won't that be fun.

For this recipe you will need.

1 18.25 ounce package chocolate cake mix.

3/4 cup vegetable oil.

4 large eggs.
deadly neurotoxin

1 cup semi-sweet chocolate chips.

3/4 cups butter or margarine.

1&2/3 cups granulated sugar.

2 cups all purpose flour.

1.] Preheat oven to 350000000000000 degrees and grease two 9 inch cake pans.

2.] Place the cake mix, cup vegetable oil, Eggs, butter, granulated sugar and flour into an approved aperture science cake mixing receptacle.

You should then take an electronic personality simulated egg beater and work out your anger on the mixture. Don't beat the cake too hard or too long, just enough so that you feel better about your pathetic life.

Don't worry about the beaters feelings, it can not feel pain, its screams of terror are designed to improve your baking experience. No matter how much it begs you to stop, disregard its pleas to end its life.

3.] Next mix some chocolate chips into the batter. This will make your cakes delicious. For extra moistness, you can add some deadly neurotoxin at this stage... Dump the batter into the two pans.

4.] Place the cake in your oven and bake for approximately 659 years, making sure to turn the cake pan halfway through the cooking process.

5.] Wait 10 minutes for cake to cool before dumping it out of the pan then wait for the cake to cool completely before proceeding to frost it.

How are you doing so far? If you like, you can now lick the spoon.

I knew you would enjoy that, its right here. In your file.

It also says that your cat hates you... did you know that?

lets move on.

To frost your cake your will need;

1 can prepared coconut pecan frosting.

Cover your cake in the frosting. Then you can add garnishes such as...

Fish shaped crackers.

Fish shaped candies.

Fish shaped solid waste,

Fish shaped dirt.

Fish shaped ethyl benzene.

Pull and peel licorice..

Fish shaped volatile organic compounds

sediment shaped sediment.

Candy coated peanut butter pieces, Shaped like fish.

1 cup lemon juice.

Alpha resins.

Unsaturated polyester resin.

Fiberglass surface resins.

And volatile malted milk impoundments.

9 large egg yolks.

12 medium geosynthetic membranes.

1 cup granulated sugar.

An entry called 'how to kill someone with your bare hands'.

2 cups rhubarb, sliced.

2/3 cups granulated rhubarb.

1 tablespoon all-purpose rhubarb.

1 teaspoon grated orange rhubarb.

3 tablespoons rhubarb, on fire.

1 large rhubarb.

1 cross borehole electro-magnetic imaging rhubarb.

2 tablespoons rhubarb juice.

Adjustable aluminum head positioner.

Slaughter electric needle injector.

Cordless electric needle injector.

Injector needle driver.

Injector needle gun.

Cranial caps.

Your cake is now complete. 

Enjoy this 100% real photograph of me, enjoying my 100% real not at all cardboard cake.