Stuff you didn't know you wanted till now

STUFF! Everyone likes stuff. Especially when it’s cool stuff. I’ve rounded up some of the coolest geek stuff I’ve found on that there interwebs for your enjoyment, so wallets at the ready, yeah?

(Most of it I have admittedly found on Think Geek. Think Geek, open a UK warehouse or something would you? I want to throw all my cash at you and I can’t because of stupid import taxes. UGH.)

Lego Minecraft:

Starting as we mean to go on, let’s investigate Minecraft merch. Yeah, there’s lots of cool stuff, like the foam swords and pickaxes and the ‘diamond’ necklace (which I now actually own), but now there’s Minecraft Lego, complete with its own little Steve and even a Creeper!

You could build your own little land, then playact as Steve building his own village and periodically running away screaming when the creeper comes to mess up everyone’s day. Or is that just how I play it?

Portal 2 long fall socks:

I have this feeling I’ve covered these before, but I’m waaaay too lazy to check. Either way, don’t you want these? Obviously you’d never be able to do long falls for real (not without your shin bones shooting up through your ribcage, anyway) but you’d LOOK cool, and that’s what’s important. Fact.

Lightsaber:

Surely a must have for any Star Wars fan. They light up and turn off just like to lightsabers in the movies, and even make the hum noise when you swish it about while threatening the cat. Even better, they make the clashing noise when you hit something with it. I know this first hand as I bought Matt one a few years ago, and I was rewarded by being smashed in the head with it repeatedly. Thanks, dear.

Mockingjay pin:

As much as the love triangle plot of the Hunger Games series drives me crazy, I have to admit I love everything else about the books. There’s some cool movie merch out there, including recreations of the costumes and even a Hunger Games cookbook, but I like the pin the best. Buy it, stick it on your jacket and pretend to be a rebel. Good times.

Firefly posters:

In lieu of a real life browncoat (MAKE IT HAPPEN, SERIOUSLY), I’m going with these posters. They’d look so pretty in my house, if only I had wall space for them...
I have to ask though, why is there a tourism poster for Serenity Valley? Do people go there to imagine the severe PTSD the soldiers inevitably have? Whatever, it’s still pretty.

Red shirt:

Speaks for itself, really. There was a baby version, too, but it seemed unspeakably cruel.

Proclamation board:

Yeah, yeah, you can buy the wands and that, but I want THIS. I could hang it on the wall and write shouty notes on it.

NO ONE SHALL EAT THE LAST OF THE CHOCOLATE ON PAIN OF DEATH

THE SHOW ‘FRIENDS’ IS NOW BANNED FROM THE TV UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE

NOTHING WILL BE BORROWED WITHOUT EXPRESS WRITTEN PERMISSION FROM THE OWNER, SO HANDS OFF MY STUFF

Ride In Dalek:

I don’t care that I’m way too big to fit in it, I NEED IT NOOOOOW.

The Zombie Outbreak guide to NaNoWriMo

As you may well know, November, as well as being the month of Movember (In which Matt is participating, so go give some money already! http://uk.movember.com/mospace/528720), is National Novel Writing Month, or NaNoWriMo. Because I am clearly wrong in the head, I signed up to participate for the second year running. If you’re crazy like me, you probably need some pointers or tips to get through the month. Coming up with that 1667 words per day is a lot harder than it looks.



Well, look no further kids! In order to help out my fellow Wrimos and geeks, let me present to you the Zombie Outbreak guide to NaNoWriMo.

Getting started

Ok, it might be a bit late for this this year, but still, its useful information. Sometimes you sign up all ‘YEAH LET’S WRITE A NOVEL YO IT’S GONNA BE SWEET’, and then when you sit down in front of your word processing program, you find you’ve got nothing. Nada. Zilch.

It’s a horrible feeling, but fear not! There is a solution! What you need to do is think about your favourite genre, and then find an existing work you can steal mercilessly from. Into sci fi? Why not nick from Firefly or Star Trek? Horror? Rob a monster from Silent Hill! Adventure? Borrow Nathan Drake’s handsome chops!



I’m not saying write yourself a rip off of Fallout 3 or anything, but if you can borrow some plot elements from your favourite franchises, you’ll find you can build a new story around them. Handy!

Characters

Characters are hard. It is scientific fact. Sometimes you can be writing away, but you feel as if your main character is nothing more than a cardboard cut out that you’re projecting yourself onto (oh wait, haven’t I just described that bint out of Twilight?). What do?



Well, I find the best way to build a character is again, by stealing. This time, steal from your friends. Do you have a friend who organises his dice by colour and type? Put that in your character. Do you know someone who can’t play drums on Rock Band without smashing her foot down on the bass pedal and breaking it? Put it in. If you can gather the right blend of traits and idiosyncrasies, your character will be much better fleshed out and believable.

Plot

Sometimes it’s very easy to get bogged down in character descriptions, and have lengthy conversations between people in your story that don’t go anywhere. When this happens, you need to start thinking about plot and pacing.

If you have no idea what I’m talking about, think of it like a DnD or table top roleplaying game campaign. If you went through the whole game going into room after room, finding more and more demons to slay, after a while you’d get bored out of your tiny skull and start throwing dice at the GM (or is that just me? Erm, sorry Rich...).



However, if that campaign were to include different elements, such as devious traps, fiendish puzzles, or simply getting a wizard drunk in the tavern (which we did once), then it gets exciting. Apply this to your novel, and mix it up a bit. Bring in a tidal wave. Send your characters on a quest, even if it is just to Tescos. Put a dragon in the basement. It’s your book, do what you want!

And finally...



Honestly? Don’t worry too hard about what you’re writing. I had a moment last week where I thought ‘OH GOD THIS IS ALL CRAP I’LL HAVE TO START OVER’, but I’ve soldiered on regardless. You’ll have that moment too, if you haven’t already, I promise you. And when you do, the best advice I can give is, DON’T GIVE UP. At all. Ever. You might think its crap now, but it’s only a rough first draft. You can fix all the plot holes and glaring inconsistencies later. For now, just have fun with it.

And watch out for that dragon in the basement.